Amongst so many of the weird and unnatural habits that the average Gamer has, poor hygiene is by far their most fowl. The EVG doesn't tend to ever move out of his seat except for the two neccesities of eating and evacuating. This behavior can easily get in the way of a standard hygiene routine. One would think that the Gamer's rancid aroma would eventually reach a point that would even bother them, but with the rapid evolution of their gaming genetics, their sense of smell has become drastically selective. The only smells that the EVG can even detect anymore are the smell of freshly microwaved hot pockets and a recently opened bag of Funyun's and Cheetos. The EVG is forced to rely on his other senses for survival in case of an emergency that may occur in its habitat.
Lack of clean laundry also falls into place when speaking of a Gamer's hygiene. The same over-worn, faded-out, and possibly torn t-shirt representing the Gamer's favorite video game release date bearing countless pit stains accented by the greasy ones (courtesy of hot pockets =D). The EVG's mother would gladly take of his laundry, but the stench barrier put up by the EVG put's its mom out of submission when crossing into its stink field. When a few or more of these EVG's gather together to have a LAN party (an event where these gamer's link their gaming devices together), it turns into a battle of musk. The paint can only pray that it doesn't slowly get peeled off of the walls in agony. The stink-like aura that is produced from each gamer fuses with another forming a horrible yellow cloud bent on destroying anything that smells good. It basically turns into the Anti-FeBreeze. So now, I'm asking for help. Anyone who knows an EVG such as this should do their part. Get a small group of people and force that gamer to shower immediately. With today's world rapidly going green, these smelly polluters need to be taken care of and put under surveillance so it doesn't happen again. So unfortunately when the Gamer buys the game, the shower is sold seperately.
Lack of clean laundry also falls into place when speaking of a Gamer's hygiene. The same over-worn, faded-out, and possibly torn t-shirt representing the Gamer's favorite video game release date bearing countless pit stains accented by the greasy ones (courtesy of hot pockets =D). The EVG's mother would gladly take of his laundry, but the stench barrier put up by the EVG put's its mom out of submission when crossing into its stink field. When a few or more of these EVG's gather together to have a LAN party (an event where these gamer's link their gaming devices together), it turns into a battle of musk. The paint can only pray that it doesn't slowly get peeled off of the walls in agony. The stink-like aura that is produced from each gamer fuses with another forming a horrible yellow cloud bent on destroying anything that smells good. It basically turns into the Anti-FeBreeze. So now, I'm asking for help. Anyone who knows an EVG such as this should do their part. Get a small group of people and force that gamer to shower immediately. With today's world rapidly going green, these smelly polluters need to be taken care of and put under surveillance so it doesn't happen again. So unfortunately when the Gamer buys the game, the shower is sold seperately.
2 comments:
true that. smelly ass gamers. good call jethro.
That is true. I can't tell how many times my gamer friends needed to shower before i even went into the room with them.
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